Thursday, December 18, 2008

Read the Small Print Between the Lines

Today tastes like cream cheese, smoked salmon, capers, and avocados. Like champagne and creek water, like belgian chocolates and crostini. Like proscuitto and melon and gunpowder.

It's been one of those days, and it's not even half-over yet. A co-worker heard me muttering about taking the whole world on a picnic.

"Oh, that's so sweet and generous of you!" she cooed. "You're so giving and nurturing! You want to sit down and make peace with the whole world."

I almost--ALMOST--didn't have the heart to explain that when you "take someone on a picnic" you take them to a pristine and deserted place full of wildflowers and trees, near a babbling brook. You feed them lovely morsels of finger food, and chill wine in the icy stream. You laugh and talk in the sun, gentle breezes ruffle your hair, and you share a deep and intimate connection.

Then you kill them, and bury the body where no one will ever find it.

1 comment:

Roy said...

That is possibly the best tasting day ever. Also, you're really pulling out the Samual Clemens there:

"I thoroughly disapprove of duels. I consider them unwise and I know they are dangerous. Also, sinful. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet retired spot and kill him."

Merry Solsticemas.